Premarital Counseling: What is it? Why we should get it?

Hi, I’m Angela, I have a husband with bipolar 2 disorder, my kids have ADHD, and I myself have struggled with depression—YOU’RE NOT ALONE! This week’s mental health tips are about premarital counseling-what is it? And why should I get it?

You’ve fallen in love and taken that big leap of commitment and you’re engaged. Now comes the wedding planning. The average cost of a wedding in the US is 35,000. Not that it needs to be that expensive, but financial stresses and wedding concerns can often distract the couple from what’s really important—building the foundation of their relationship.

Premarital Counseling—What is it?

Premarital counseling is a type of therapy that helps couples to prepare for their marriage. We’ve all heard the Benjamin Franklin quote, “By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.” No one starts out a marriage wanting to fail, but the odds are stacked against us if we are naïve enough to believe that we won’t need work on our relationship to make it thrive. Premarital counseling sets the groundwork for a more stable and satisfying relationship in the long-term.

Why should we get it?

According to Drs. John and Julie Gottman, the average couple waits six years before seeking help for marital problems, that’s 2,190 days of struggle. On top of that ½ of all marriages that do end in divorce will end in the first 7 years. Those first years are pretty important. The preparation of premarital counseling isn’t just about going through the sessions and filling out the assessments, it’s about preparing your heart to receive instruction and to be open to transformation through the marriage relationship. And let’s not ignore what it says in Proverbs 19:20…


Get all the advice and instruction you can, so you will be wise the rest of your life. Proverbs 19:20 (NLT)

We all need wisdom in our marriages. From before they start, and all the way through.


What are your thoughts on premarital counseling? Comment below, I’d love to hear from you, and don’t miss next week’s video on what you can expect in premarital counseling. Be sure to check out the great resources in the notes below that will show you how to connect with premarital counseling tools and counselors.

A big thank you to counselors Dan Bates, Gil Stuart, and Dr. Kristen White for consulting with me on this series, along with His Heart Foundation for supporting this channel. If you want more in-depth mental health information for you and those you love check out today.

Connect to a premarital counselor:

Request A Counselor Referral

Recommended Resources:

Premarital Counseling Tools

  1. Prepare and Enrich

The number one premarital assessment for 35 years. It’s best to go through this with a counselor or trained facilitator.

  1. SYMBIS – Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts

The world’s more practical marriage assessment. The website can connect you with a facilitator in your area.

  1. Prologue—Start Marriage Here

A free online program designed by Dr. Gary Chapman, author of The 5 Love Languages


Hold Me Tight—Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love

Created for Connection

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work

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