Last week we talked about why premarital counseling is an awesome idea if you and your spouse want to set yourselves up for success. Here are some of the 4 main issues you can expect at your sessions:
Basic Life Expectations
Who does what in regards to household responsibilities. What does clean mean to you? Defining things and being practical can save you a lot trouble down the road.
I looked back at my husband and my premarital counseling paperwork. Yes, I kept it for the last 25 years. I’m glad I did because it was hilarious, we might have been a little naïve, but it definitely showed the benefit of spending the time thinking through the questions in the assessment. One thing I noticed in the section about our individual family histories was the list of things we wanted to incorporate into our new family. Michael wanted to include his mom and dad’s hard work ethic, and commitment to their children. I wanted to include my parent’s example of trust, respect, and affection. The exercise gave us a start for how we wanted to build our family and relationship.
Who’s the saver, who’s the spender? How will you handle budgeting and setting goals? What are your values? That will determine what you spend your money on.
Things like family planning, careers, and dreams. These are all important things to discuss.
What are your thoughts on premarital counseling? Comment below, I’d love to hear from you. And don’t miss the great resources in the notes below that will show you how to connect with premarital counseling tools and counselors.
A big thank you to counselors Dan Bates, Gil Stuart, and Dr. Kristen White for consulting with me on this series, along with His Heart Foundation for supporting this channel. If you want more in-depth mental health information for you and those you love check out mentalhealth.academy today.
Connect to a premarital counselor
Don’t feel like you need to pick just one! Consult with a counselor to see your best fit.
Premarital Counseling Tools
- Prepare and Enrich
The number one premarital assessment for 35 years. It’s best to go through this with a counselor or trained facilitator.
- SYMBIS – Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts
The world’s more practical marriage assessment. The website can connect you with a facilitator in your area.
- Prologue—Start Marriage Here
A free online program designed by Dr. Gary Chapman, author of The 5 Love Languages
Hold Me Tight—Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love
Created for Connection
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
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